Redneck Computer Geek
You might be a redneck addicted to the
world of computers if...
- If yer computer stand is made of a stack of
old tires or 2 x 8's and cinderblocks.
- Ya think www. in a url is a logo for a
- Someone tells ya they're "locked up" and ya
ask if they need bail money.
- Ya've ever been too drunk to chat.
- Ya think a hard drive is a trip to Uncle
- Yer mouse keeps knocking over yer spit can.
- Ya think a surge suppressor is a pill for
- Ya keep trying to figure out why yer scanner
won't pick up police radio calls.
- Ya think a megabyte is a new sandwich at
- Ya have to ask someone how to spell LOL.
- Yer stomach overlaps half of yer keyboard.
- Ya try to figure out how to get yer empty beer
cans into the recyclin' bin.
- Ya try to turn on yer computer with the
- Ya try to figure out how yer floppy disk got
- Ya play Frisbee with yer CD Rom's.
- Ya find yerself on the floor looking into yer
"A Drive" yelling 'Give it back! Give it Back'.
- When birds fly across yer screen ya reach
for yer shotgun.
- Yer yards full
of ol' computers stacked on cinder blocks.
- Ya use yer CD-ROM drive as a beer holder.
- Ya call tech support an ask where ta buy
stamps fer yer e-mail.
- Ya think ICQ is how smert yer computer is.
- Ya think yer homepage is where ya really live.
- Ya give directions to a website that include a
person, animal, or old barn.
- Ya see the word Download, and take the shells
out of yer shotgun.
- Ya think the person that made yer keyboard was
dumb cuz the letters aint in order.
- Ya see the "shift" key and try ta figure out
how ta change gears.
- Ya see the word "Zip" and know why youz feelin'
- Yer puter has a bumper sticker on it.
- Part of yer puter is held together with duct
- Ya sees the word "Refresh" and reach into the
cooler fer another beer.
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