Redneck on a Hot Date

Here’s a double dose

of Redneck Humor for you!

(Don’t get offended.  The owner of Funnies.com is a redneck, too.)

Redneck Medical Terms

Artery………………….The study of paintings.
Benign………………….What you be after you be eight.
Bacteria………………..Back door to cafeteria.
Barium………………….What doctors do when patients die.
Cesarean Section…………A neighborhood in Rome.
Cat Scan…………………Searching for Kitty.

Cauterize……………….Made eye contact with her.
Coma……………………A punctuation mark.
Dilate………………….To live long.
Enema…………………..Not a friend.
Fester………………….Quicker than someone else.
Fibula………………….A small lie.
 

Hangnail………………..What you hang your coat on.
Impotent………………..Distinguished, well known.
Labor Pain………………Getting hurt at work.
Medical Staff……………A Doctor’s cane.
Morbid………………….A higher offer than I bid.
Nitrates………………..Cheaper than day rates.
Node……………………I knew it.
Pelvis………………….Second cousin to Elvis.
Post Operative…………..A letter carrier.

Rectum………………….Darn near killed him.
Seizure…………………Roman emperor.
Tablet………………….A small table.
Tumor…………………..More than one.
Urine…………………..Opposite of you’re out
Varicose………………..Near by