My Butt Hurts

Life is NOT like a box of chocolates… It‘s more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today,might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don’t waste your time. You’re NOT gonna find one!
Sometimes people should think about how their last names fit together before they get married…
Little Red Riding Hood is skipping down the roadwhen she sees the Big Bad Wolf crouched down behind a log. “My, what big eyes you have, Mr. Wolf,”says Little Red Riding Hood. The surprised wolf jumps up and runs away.Further down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again;this time he is crouched behind a…
Are My Testicles Black? A man is lying in bed in a Catholic hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth. A young auxiliary nurse appears to sponge his face and hands. “Nurse,” he mumbles from behind the mask, “Are my testicles black?” Embarrassed the young nurse replies, “I don’t know, I’m only here to…
We’ll just take the most prominent for example’s sake: $ Michael Jordan having “retired,” with $40 million in endorsements, makes $178,100 a day, working or not. $ If he sleeps 7 hours a night, he makes $52,000 every night while visions of sugarplums dance in his head. $ If he goes to see a movie,…