If Women Made All Calendars…

The Old Man’s Job Application This is an actual job application that a 75 year old senior citizen submitted to Wal-Mart in Arkansas. NAME: George Martin SEX: Not lately, but I am looking for the right woman, (or at least, one who’ll cooperate). DESIRED POSITION: Company President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever’s available. If I was in…

Now THAT’S a lot of Snow!

Are My Testicles Black? A man is lying in bed in a Catholic hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth.  A young auxiliary nurse appears to sponge his face and hands. “Nurse,” he mumbles from behind the mask, “Are my testicles black?” Embarrassed the young nurse replies, “I don’t know, I’m only here to…

The Texan Farmer A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and begins talking. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says,“Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large.”   Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the…

I saw this on a washroom wall at a truck stop on Highway 401, near Port Hope, Ontario a few years back: My mother made me a homosexual! Below in another handwriting: If I left her the wool, would she make me one too?

January 2000: Kathleen Robertson of Austin Texas was awarded $780,000.00 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running amuck inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving tyke was Ms. Robertson’s son. June 1998: A 19-year-old…