If Women Made All Calendars…

The Moods of a Woman An angel of truth and a dream of fiction,A woman is a bundle of contradiction,She’s afraid of a wasp, will scream at a mouse,But will tackle a stranger alone in the house.Sour as vinegar, sweet as a rose,She’ll kiss you one minute, then turn up her nose,She’ll win you in…

Dear Diary, I never have quite figured out why the sexual urges of men & women differ so much. And I have never figured out the whole ‘Venus and Mars’ thing. I’ve also never figured out why men think with their head while women think with their heart. And I’ve yet to figure out how…

Farting Your Guts Out Bob and Martha have been married for 15 years. Every morning for 15 years, Bob wakes up, farts loudly, rolls over onto his back and gets up for work.Every morning for 15 years, Martha says, “One of these days, you’re gonna fart your guts out!”One Thanksgiving morning, Martha is preparing the…

A blonde walks into a doctor’s office and tells the doctorshe’s broken every single bone in her body.“That’s impossible!” says the doctor. The blonde says, “No, it’s really true. Look!”She then touches her leg with her index finger and screams “Ouch!”Then she touches her arm and yells “Eeeeoooow!”Finally she touches her ribs and can barely…

Why Snowmen Hate Dogs