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You might be a Redneck Jedi if…
* You ever heard the phrase, “May the force be with y’all.” * Your Jedi robe is camouflage. * You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Bud Light. * You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok. * You have ever had a land-speeder up on blocks in your…
Markers for Christmas
Why You Should NOTGive Your Child Markers for Christmas
Liquor Warning
Due to increasing products liability litigation, American liquor manufacturershave accepted the FDA’s suggestion that the following warning labelsbe placed immediately on all containers: Warnings: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wonderingwhat the heck happened to your bra. The consumption of alcohol may make you thinkyou are whispering when you are not. The consumption…
Before It Starts
A man comes home from an exhausting day at work,plops down on the couch in front of the television,and tells his wife, “Get me a beer before it starts!” The wife sighs and gets him a beer. Ten minutes later, he says, “Get me another beerbefore it starts!” She looks across, but fetches another beer…
Ghost Joke
An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests. The last test had left his system upset. For hours he made several false-alarm trips to the bathroom. Finally giving up on going, he decided his latest urge to go to the bathroom was just another false alarm, so he stayed put. …