Life Is Not a Box of Chocolates
Life is NOT
like a box of chocolates…

It‘s more like a jar of jalapenos.

What you do today,
might burn your ass tomorrow.


Life is NOT
like a box of chocolates…

It‘s more like a jar of jalapenos.

What you do today,
might burn your ass tomorrow.


Are My Testicles Black? A man is lying in bed in a Catholic hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth. A young auxiliary nurse appears to sponge his face and hands. “Nurse,” he mumbles from behind the mask, “Are my testicles black?” Embarrassed the young nurse replies, “I don’t know, I’m only here to…
A struggling zoo’s main attraction, a gorilla, dies during their most popular season. They can’t afford to lose the gorilla so they secretly hire one of the employees to be a gorilla in a suit for an extra $500 a week. He quickly becomes even more popular than the original gorilla, everyone wants to see…
How to Rob a Snowman
A blonde is explaining to her girlfriend the bad day she’d had at work, and that her boss had suffered a heart attack and died. “How horrible!” said the friend, “What did you do?” The blonde replies, “Well there was nothing I could do. He kept yelling at me to call 9-1-1, but he wouldn’t…