“Ridiculous Quotes”

The lineage is finally revealed. Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says; “You don’t know Jack Schitt.”Now you can intellectually handle the situation. Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt.            Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt,the owner of the Needeep N. Schitt, Inc.They had…

Slightly Offensive, Hilarious Pictures (proceed only if you are not easily offended) Click here to see Hilarious Picture #2

The Reason Why I Fired My Secretary Two weeks ago was my forty-fifth birthday, and I wasn’t feelingtoo hot that morning anyway.  I went to breakfast knowing my wifewould be pleasant and say “Happy Birthday,”and would probably have a present for me.She didn’t even say “Good Morning,” let alone any “Happy Birthday.” I thought, “Well, that’s…

A man comes home from an exhausting day at work,plops down on the couch in front of the television,and tells his wife, “Get me a beer before it starts!” The wife sighs and gets him a beer.  Ten minutes later, he says, “Get me another beerbefore it starts!”  She looks across, but fetches another beer…