Pepsi and Coke

Life is NOT like a box of chocolates… It‘s more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today,might burn your ass tomorrow.

After centuries of pondering, contemplating, studying, researching, and experimenting, men have finally concluded the following: 

I saw this on a washroom wall at a truck stop on Highway 401, near Port Hope, Ontario a few years back: My mother made me a homosexual! Below in another handwriting: If I left her the wool, would she make me one too?

A man walks into the doctor’s office with a serious problem! “Doctor, I’ve had problems with silent gas emissions. At home, work, and even at church, I release tons of silent farts everywhere I go! As a matter of fact I’ve had three sitting here talking to you. What are we going to do?” The…