Man’s Remote Control for Women

Why I Am So Tired!!! For a couple of years I’ve been blaming it on lack of sleep,not enough sunshine, too much pressure from my job,earwax build-up, poor blood or anything else I could think of. But now I found out the real reason:I’m tired because I’m overworked. Here’s why: The population of this country…

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding… Officer: May I see your driver’s license? Driver: I don’t have one. I had it suspended when I got my fifth DUI. Officer: Can I see the registration for this vehicle? Driver: Oh, it’s not my car. I stole it. Officer: The car is stolen? Driver: Yeah. Oh, but come to think…

Shove It Up Your …!  Upon arriving home in eager anticipation of a leisurely evening, the husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife. Tearfully she explained, “It’s the pharmacist – he insulted me terribly this morning on the phone.”Immediately, the husband drove downtown to accuse the pharmacist and demand an apology.Before he…

A 70-year-old man goes to the doctor’s for a physical. The doctor runs some tests and says to the man, ”Well, everything seems to be in top condition physically, but what about mentally? How is your connection with God?” And the man says, ”Oh me and God? We’re tight. We have a real bond, he’s…